Gratitude In An Age Of Entitlement
Pastors Leslie & Adeline Chua
“Give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
If gratitude could be measured, what would be your gratitude quotient? Are you a grateful person?
I observe in an affluent and privileged society like ours in Singapore, people have become generally less satisfied and more covetous. They crave for more of everything – a better life, higher pay, bigger houses, brighter kids, and so on. The quality of life has improved dramatically over the decades, but contented people are hard to find.
Why?
Because people feel entitled.
This entitlement syndrome is the scourge of our times. It is a cultural virus. It spreads quickly and it infects deeply. Entitlement thinking has become an entrenched mindset in many people, especially the younger generation.
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Gratitude is an important virtue,
but in our age of entitlement,
it is all but forgotten, if not lost.
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When people feel entitled, they become less grateful for who they are and what they have. Gratitude is inversely proportional to a person’s sense of entitlement.
Gratitude is an important virtue, but in our age of entitlement, it is all but forgotten, if not lost.
Only One Leper is Grateful
Jesus extolled the virtue of gratitude.
On one occasion, ten lepers begged Jesus to heal them. Jesus instructed them to show themselves to the priests. As they were on their way, they were miraculously cleansed of leprosy. Surprisingly, only one leper returned to thank Jesus for the healing.
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Jesus extolled the virtue of gratitude.
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Jesus was surprised at the lack of gratitude in the other nine other lepers. He asked, "Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?"(17:17-18).
Why the other nine Jewish lepers did not return to thank Jesus is opened to speculation. As for the Samaritan, he did not expect Jesus to show him such extraordinary kindness because Jews despised Samaritans over matters of race and religious worship. As such, he felt unworthy and undeserving of Jesus’ kindness. Hence, the gratefulness. How could he not return to thank Jesus? That would be unthinkable.
The more a person feels undeserving of a gift or a kind gesture extended to him, the more grateful he is. Conversely, if he felt entitled to it, then he would not be grateful at all.
Your Gratitude Quotient
How is your attitude quotient? Are you like the Samaritan or the nine lepers?
We are likely to think of ourselves as grateful. But think again. Consider this story.
Peter Maiden was the international director of Operation Mobilisation, a global missionary organisation. In his book, Radical Gratitude, he recounted a time when his son was dangerously ill on a hospital bed.
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Afterwards, he felt convicted by his entitlement thinking,
that he had the audacity
to tell God that He owed it to him.
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Thinking of the unthinkable, Peter prayed, “These might be my last few hours with my son. God, you can’t allow this. I am your servant and I have sacrificed for you. You owe me… you just can’t let this happen.”
Afterwards, he felt convicted by his entitlement thinking, that he had the audacity to tell God that He owed it to him. He was shocked by his own attitude toward God.
We all fall into this entitlement trap ever so occasionally, especially for those who have made big sacrifices for the sake of Christ and Christian service. When the rubber meets the road, sometimes it is just so difficult not to feel short-changed and a sense of entitlement. Mind you, we are not talking about asking God for luxury or to satisfy some selfish urges, but to be delivered from a difficult situation.
But the fact is that God owes us nothing and He is no man’s debtor. On the contrary, we owe God everything. We are heavily indebted to Him for His mercy and grace since as woeful sinners, we deserve nothing except judgement and eternal condemnation.
Rejoice, and Again I Say Rejoice
Gratitude is a posture of the heart. Gratitude recognises the sovereignty of God in all circumstances. Not just when the sun is shining brightly and life is good, but also when the chips are down and the circumstances bleak.
Paul understood this truth.
In his letter to the Philippians, Paul said these remarkable words: “Rejoice in the Lord always, again I will say, rejoice” (Philippians 4:4).
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Gratitude is a posture of the heart.
Gratitude recognises the sovereignty of God
in all circumstances. ____________________________________________
Paul was not writing these words in a victorious or happy moment. Instead, he was in prison.
Despite his predicament, Paul urged the Philippians, ‘In everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God” (Philippians 4:6). A few paragraphs later, Paul talked about learning to be content in all circumstances.
Rejoice, thanksgiving and content. Clearly, Paul did not have an entitlement mindset. He was prepared to carry his cross. He had been forewarned. Jesus told him that he would suffer much for the sake of His name (Acts 9:16).
Unworthy Servants
Jesus warned against entitlement thinking.
Jesus told a parable that seems harsh and somewhat out of place in contemporary Christian thinking.
Luke 17:7-10 (ESV)- “Will any one of you who has a servant plowing or keeping sheep say to him when he has come in from the field, ‘Come at once and recline at table’? Will he not rather say to him, ‘Prepare supper for me, and dress properly, and serve me while I eat and drink, and afterward you will eat and drink’? Does he thank the servant because he did what was commanded? So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty.’”
The word, servant, here is doulos in Greek, which is better translated as slave. A servant is entitled to his wages, but not a slave because he is the property of his master.
A slave has many duties, but he has no entitlement at all. He serves at his master’s pleasure.
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Luke’s motive is clearly to convey the message
that Christ’s disciples ought always to show gratitude
and not have the attitude of entitlement.
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Fascinatingly, this parable is placed just before the account of Jesus healing the ten lepers, out of which only one of them was grateful to Jesus. Luke’s motive is clearly to convey the message that Christ’s disciples ought always to show gratitude and not have the attitude of entitlement.
We ought to be grateful because we were unworthy sinners deserving of everlasting condemnation in hell. But God loved us so much that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to redeem us with His blood.
We ought to be so grateful for our undeserved salvation that we are willing to lay down our lives to serve our Master dutifully. However, not just out of a sense of duty, but deep heartfelt gratitude.
In this way, we will not fall into the trap of thinking that God owes it to us to meet all our needs, satisfy our wants, pander to our desires, and help us on demand. God does not owe us anything. Instead, we owe Him everything and we ought to thank Him for everything.
The Antidote to the Entitlement Mentality
In as much as entitlement thinking robs you of gratefulness, a heart of gratitude delivers you from the sense of entitlement. A grateful heart is an antidote to the toxic entitlement mentality. That is why Paul counselled, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
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A grateful heart is an antidote
to the toxic entitlement mentality. ____________________________________________
Therefore, cultivate a heart of gratitude. Give thanks to God for everything that comes your way whether it is good or bad. We can do that because the wise and sovereign God has our best interests at heart and He works everything out for our good.