Giving & Forgiving
Pastors Leslie & Adeline Chua
““…remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said:
’It is more blessed to give than to receive.’””
““Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Give, and it will be given to you.
A good measure, pressed down,
shaken together and running over,
will be poured into your lap.
For with the measure you use,
it will be measured to you.” ”
We live in a graceless culture. The virtues of giving and forgiving are increasingly less practised. There is little motivation to give, and much less to forgive. Understandably so. In our dog-eat-dog society, giving and forgiving do not seem to have any obvious benefits. It makes little sense. So, it seems.
However, we are at our human best when we give and forgive. These virtues are held in high esteem in the Holy Scripture, and it is seen in one of the most beautiful human relationships, that of mother and child. The mother’s selflessness and sacrifice bring incalculable benefits – tangible and intangible – to the healthy growth and development of her child.
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Giving is counterintuitive.
It is easier to receive than to give.
Instinctively, we prefer to take than to give.
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Most other relationships suffer from an utter lack of the grace of giving and forgiving, including the supposedly most intimate relationship between husbands and wives. The number of broken marriages and the high divorce rate is evidence of it.
Giving is counterintuitive. It is easier to receive than to give. Instinctively, we prefer to take than to give.
Taking has become an art form. Have you heard of this phrase - you don’t get what you deserve, but what you negotiate? So, there are books galore on how to negotiate.
Life is no longer about fairness and equitability, but what you can get for yourself. This is the name of the game, and the winners are celebrated. Their stories are considered success stories.
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We take, but we do not give.
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Everywhere you turn, you see people asserting themselves to secure their own interests. They use their position, money, influence, connection as weapons to improve their bargaining power. Many have no qualms resorting to lies, half-truths, sarcasm while others use flattery to cajole others into getting what they want.
We take, but we do not give.
For those who try to practise the generosity of giving, many end up disappointed. They feel underappreciated, and sometimes, totally unappreciated. Over the years, I have encountered disillusioned church and community leaders who commented that giving is a futile exercise. “People are ungrateful” is a general feeling.
We are Called to Give
It is sad. This is not how we are supposed to live. Our Lord Jesus in His humanity shows us the way to live. Give, and it will be given to you. With the measure you give, it will be reciprocated to you. It is more blessed to give than to receive. These are the words of Jesus.
Christ’s words are matched by the way He lived. He lived a surrendered life. Not in being held hostage to the world by His compassion and altruism, but in total surrender to His Heavenly Father. Jesus gave for the benefit of humanity. He gave His life so that we might be forgiven and be saved. He died so that we might live and receive the abundant life.
Follow Jesus. Lay down your life and give your all and your best to God.
Giving Nourishes Our Soul
Wouldn’t it impoverish me if I give my all?
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Giving benefits you.
Giving generously and sacrificially
nourishes your soul beyond what you can imagine.
It brings meaning, purpose, and beauty to your life,
which money and power cannot bring.
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The answer is no. On the contrary, giving benefits you. Giving generously and sacrificially nourishes your soul beyond what you can imagine. It brings meaning, purpose, and beauty to your life, which money and power cannot bring.
When you give special attention to someone, be it your spouse or someone you are trying to help, you put in time and effort to nurture that relationship. Your focus and dedication to the person do something mysterious and magical to you. Your feeling, affection, and commitment to the person grow. You will also be rewarded with a sense of joy and satisfaction.
The opposite is also true. Without the grace of giving, people grow apart. Affection diminishes, and love grows cold. The feeling that once binds hearts together withers and finally dies.
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This is one of life’s greatest paradoxes.
In giving, you receive.
It is more blessed to give than to receive.
Jesus cannot be wrong.
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So, as you can see, in giving selflessly, you are not only enriching the lives of others. More importantly, you are also enriching your own soul. It is through giving that you find meaning, purpose, and beauty in your own life.
This is one of life’s greatest paradoxes. In giving, you receive. It is more blessed to give than to receive. Jesus cannot be wrong.
You Must Forgive
If giving is difficult, forgiving is even more difficult.
Often, the act that causes hurt or harm is done wilfully, if not intentionally, and sometimes, maliciously. Forgiveness becomes doubly difficult when you have given and invested so much. Instead of showing gratefulness, the person ‘bites the hand that feeds him.’ Such stories abound.
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If giving is difficult,
forgiving is even more difficult.
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Are we always expected to forgive?
Generally, the answer is yes. In teaching about giving and forgiving, Jesus began with “Forgive, and you will be forgiven” (Luke 6:37-38).
What did Jesus mean?
It follows the principle of giving – “Give, and it will be given to you… For the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Luke 6:37-38).
Whether it is giving or forgiving, you will receive the same measure of what you are prepared to release. This is a divine principle.
We get an even clearer picture with these statements from Jesus in His Sermon on the Mount. Immediately after teaching His disciples on prayer, Jesus said, “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15).
This teaching of Christ comes as a shocker to many modern-day Christians. Aren’t we forgiven by the grace of God when we confess our sins? So, why did Jesus lay a condition for the forgiveness of our sins?
For the simple reason that we all are recipients of His grace. If not for His grace, no one could be saved. We will be consigned to a miserable eternity in hell.
It might not occur to you, but our sins are grievous and offensive to God, who is holy and pure. So, it follows that if God forgives our sins, we do not have any excuse not to forgive those who sin against us.
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Unforgiveness is an affront to God.
It mocks the grace and goodness
He has lavished on us.
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Our debt owed to God, which He cancelled by His mercy and grace, is infinitely more than the debts others could possibly owe to us. Therefore, we have no good excuse to withhold forgiveness to others. Jesus illustrated this truth in the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Matthew 18:21-35).
Unforgiveness is an affront to God. It mocks the grace and goodness He has lavished on us.
The Cancel Culture
One of the latest cultural phenomena is the cancel culture. It appears out of the blue a few years ago and it is now a rage. It affects many strata of society.
Politicians cancel one another. Media and social media platforms blatantly censor information with which they disagree. Young people cancel out friends whom they dislike. Often, it is done viciously and vengefully.
What is worse is people are cancelled in the name of the new cultural buzzword, social justice, which really is no justice at all. The usage of the term, social justice, merely serves to emote a sense of righteousness to cloak hidden motives.
Essentially, this is how the cancel culture works. People with differences in opinions, views, and perspectives are cancelled. In other words, they are shut down forcefully. Disagreement and differences are not tolerated. No reason needs to be given.
They achieve their purpose with brute force through lies, deception, manipulation, oppression, and intimidation. In a nutshell, that is how the cancel culture works.
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The cancel culture is the antithesis
of giving and forgiving.
It demands. It takes. it destroys.
The practitioners are unforgiving.
They put down those with whom they disagree brutally.
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The cancel culture is cancer. It kills ideas. It discourages debates and public discourses. These people are not interested in truths and facts. Their goal is simply to have things their way.
The cancel culture is the antithesis of giving and forgiving. It demands. It takes. it destroys. The practitioners are unforgiving. They put down those with whom they disagree brutally.
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In cancel culture,
the stain of sin never gets erased.
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There is no forgiveness. If you have made a mistake 25 years ago, it can come back to haunt you. These people have no qualms digging out the matter to cancel you. It does not matter if you had already repented and change your ways. In cancel culture, the stain of sin never gets erased.
Christians must be careful to distance themselves from the cancel culture. God is redemptive, and so we also must be redemptive. We ought always to give and forgive. We are mindful that in giving we receive, and it is always more blessed to give than receive.
We choose the way of Christ!